Saturday, November 10, 2012

after all this while

I wonder where I go wrong this time. I wonder whether all these happened because of me or not. I am being wondering so many things lately. So many things on head. Had to bear it all alone. No one understands. No one knows. I get tired of crying alone. I get tired of being worrying alone. I get tired of thinking this and that alone. I am all alone. Sometimes I wonder whether this is karma I've been scaring of before. I've tried to switch the negativity into a good one. Tried to make it looks positive in the process of teaching myself to be matured. But as usual, I'm failed. I am always a failure. Maybe that explains why it is happening to me. I don't know to whom I shall share the story. The only person I want to share it just don't need me at all. It is so obvious makes me feel so sad whenever I think of it. I just need to stay strong to go through all this. I just hope this is all for temporary and my patience will be paid off.

I am sad.

So sad I couldn't say any word to express my sadness except, S A D .

To Allah I turn my sadness and He knows every single thing that happened to me must have a reason behind it. A good reason of course. Whatever happen to my future, I believe in your fate Ya Allah. There's no reason for me to feel bad about it. Just don't leave me Ya Allah. Keep me strong. I know I am capable enough to handle every test You put on me. I've handled it well before.

O Dear Allah,

You are the only one who knows how I feel, what I want and what I need. I am giving all my trusts to You that every plan You have for everyone of us is the best plan we might not realize it today, but in the future, we will understand and accept the plan You had made for us was the best plan of all.

O Dear Allah,

Heal me. I don't want to live in this way, weak and pathetic. I need to be cured.


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